Michael English

This is a picture of Sharaya and Natalie on their first day of college. As I have mentioned in past posts, Sharaya wants to be an attorney. What I haven't mentioned is how, when and who inspired her.
It all started when she was 8 years old. She had been talking to a friend of ours who was an attorney. He had asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up. Up to this point she had no idea. He began to talk to her about being an attorney. That night, when she got home, she told me that she may want to be an attorney. I asked her "really? why?" She said "because I was talking to Mike, and it sounds like it would be a cool job". Since she thought (and might I add, still thinks) he was so cool, she wanted to be an attorney too.
Sadly we all lost Michael English on July 9th 2005. And what a loss it truly was. Today is the 4 year anniversary of this tragedy. Mike will never be forgotten in our household. Sharaya has never forgotten the conversations with Mike. She is more determined than ever to fulfill the dream of hers.
As part of a final for her summer course, she had to interview someone who has the same degree she is pursuing. My heart broke when she was telling me how much she wished he was still here. As part of her High School plan, she wants to volunteer at at a Law Office. Once again, she reminded me how much she misses him. He may no longer be here on earth with us, but as long as I put my daughter through college, and I see her dreams become a reality, he will always be in our hearts and our minds. I thank him personally for making a life long POSITIVE impact on my baby girl.
Mike was such a fun loving guy. He was the type of person everyone wanted to be with. I can still hear his laugh. I'm smiling now at all the silly things he loved to tease us about. His laugh was contagious. He was such a giver in so many ways. He was my attorney at one point in my life, and every time for several weeks after I used his services, when he would see me, he would ask "Are you doing ok?" He truly cared and loved people. If only more people could carry on his legacy of putting others before yourself, it would be a much happier place on earth.
To Mike's dear family that was left behind, our thoughts and prayers are with you, not just today, but always.

Missing My Babies

Today, I'm feeling lonely. Both of my older girls are gone and I miss them. They are having Fun in The Sun, in beautiful San Diego CA. They are also going to The Happiest Place on Earth, Disneyland. My all time FAVORITE thing to do, is spend time with my babies. ALL of them. When one is missing, I know it and feel incomplete. I have two missing right now and am beside myself sad. Sharaya, Hunter and I LOVE to laugh. We share many fond memories like, laughing so hard and hiding behind display cases at Smart and Final just so we could get a picture of this crazy guy that weighed about 450lbs. That wasn't bad, after all, I'm over weight too. The bad part (picture worthy)was, he was wearing tiny shorts with a midriff top that showed off about 8 inches of belly. He also sported knee high socks and a tight beanie to top it off. Why he was buying 100 rolls of toilet paper and cheese is beyond me. I guess the Good Lord sent this angel to us because he knew we needed a good laugh.
I could sit her all day long with stories to tell, but Beaudrick is calling for me, I need to put dinner on the grill, and the girls are begging to go to the park. By the Way, Beaudrick is scheduled for surgery July 28th please keep him in your prayers.
To Sharaya and Hunter, if you read this, have loads of fun, create funny memories that we can laugh about, and be ready to party when you get home. I Cant wait to pop some corn and stay up all night laughing. Love You Both, Mom

Beaudrick Update

Last Wednesday we took Beaudrick to his cleft lip/palate meeting with a panel of doctors. We met with an Orthodontist, an ENT, Three Plastic Surgeons, a Dietitian, a RN, a Speech Therapist, and a Periodontist. We were disappointed to find out that Beaudrick will not have his first surgery until he is 3-6 months gestationally corrected, which is 4-7 months old. We were originally told he would have the surgery once he reached 10 lbs. His plastic surgeon said that with recent studies, it is better to wait until the baby is a tad bit older since their skin is so thin and soft. There is a "window of opportunity" in newborns between 3-6 months old where the scaring is almost null. He said if you do the surgery too early, the skin is fragile, it could pull apart and leave a bigger scar. If you do the surgery too late, the scaring tends to become darker and more noticeable. If the surgery is done between 3-6 months, it is possible the scar wont even be noticeable. The surgeon is the best in this field, and came highly recommended by a few doctor and dental friends. He was also highly recommended by a woman who works daily with parents of cleft palate/lip children. She has seen hundreds of lip repairs and said none comes close to the work of our surgeon. She said "he is the best". Because of this, I truly trust his judgment and will patiently wait until the Fall for the surgery.
Every time I go to church, I miss my baby. I will begin taking him to church in June once the RSV and flu season has passed and after he has had his first set of immunizations. Once he gets closer to his big surgery date, we will keep him home again to make double sure he does not get sick.
Beaudrick now weighs 7lbs 15oz. He is still such a tiny little guy. We all LOVE to hold him. Seylum didn't learn to walk until she was 14 months old. This had to do with being held all the time. I wouldn't be surprised if Beaudrick doesn't walk until he is 2. The princesses are so good with him. Seylum loves to rub and kiss his head. She is very gentle with him. But she is sure to get tons of attention herself. She makes sure of it, one way or another. She keeps us in stitches. Her personality has really came out since Beaudrick came home. She will always be our baby girl. I cant wait to watch Beaudrick grow up with these girly girls. :) I will have to post pictures of what happens when daddy falls asleep and the girls want to play "hair salon" LOL. Poor Beaudrick, his baby scar will soon be the least of his worries :)

My Dear Mother

This Mother's Day, I want to take the time to talk about my Mother (She is Mema to our kids). She is the kind of Mother I hope to be to my children. She has been there for me in my times of sorrow and joy. She was the first person we told, when we found out we were pregnant. As I have stated before, Beaudrick was a complete surprise to us. She was there to encourage us and tell us that everything will be ok. She helped us through our time of disappointment when we found out we had to leave our home and everything in it. At times when I thought no one would see me crying in the trailer, I would hear a knock at my door and it would be her. She would come to just give me a hug. Sometimes she wouldn't say a word, but she would just hold me. When she did say something to encourage me, it was always what I needed to hear. When I found out about Beaudrick, I went to her home where once again she let me cry on her shoulder. She always looks at the brighter side of life. She continued to tell me just how perfect my baby was. When Beaudrick was placed in my arms, it was her and a very dear friend who held me both physically and emotionally. Thanks Mom for being there for me!
When I think of my Mom, I think
1. CLASSY- WOW!!! does this women have class. I have never been embarrassed of her actions or her dress. She carries herself and her age so well. I hope I get her genes. She is so beautiful not only on the outside, but also on the inside. Even my girls comment on what a classy lady she is.
2. Dependable- She will always be there for you. No matter what I have done in life, she has always been there to pick me up. Yes, I have made some blunders in life, but she never put me down, even though I knew she was disappointed, she loved me unconditionally and stood by my side.
3. Trustworthy- I can trust my Mom with my life. She knows how to keep a secret. If there is something I need to tell her, I know it will not get passed her. When I need prayer or just someone to confide in. It is her I call. Even the King has a relationship with her, where he has learned to confide in her. There has been several times in our marriage, where my hubby (with tears in his eyes) will say "I just need to talk to your mom"
4. Prayer Warrior- When our family started going through trials, (I'm talking our whole family) it was my Mom who said "we are going to pray our way through this". She opened her home every Monday night and she fed us food for the body and soul. To this day, my girls still ask to go to Memas to pray. My older daughters still look forward to the phone calls when Mema lets them know she is praying for them. Going back to trust, our teenagers trust her too. There are not many people I trust with my girls, but my Mom is one I will always trust. So many times I have called my Mom to pray about something, and God had already laid it on her heart, she had already prayed.
These are a few of the reasons I hope to be to my children as she has been to me. I Love You Mom! Happy Mother's Day

Happy 1 Month B-Day Beaudrick

I can't believe a month has already passed since we welcomed Beaudrick to our family. He is doing so well. He now weighs 7lbs 6 oz. His cleft lip panel appointment went well. We meet with a series of specialists who will follow Beaudrick into his adulthood. The first meeting was to get a starting baseline for him. His weight was taken so that they could see how well he eats and how fast he grows. He can have his first surgery when he reaches 10 lbs. This is bitter sweet because I don't want him to grow too fast, but I can't wait to be able to take him to church with me. My mom and sister have been a GREAT help with Beaudrick. My mom stays every Sunday night with him and Darcie stays every Tuesday with him. This allows me to go to church and get much needed strength from my precious Father.
Beaudrick will meet with a panel of surgeons and doctors on May 5th. At this appointment, every Dr. will see him and try to coordinate his surgeries so that he wont have to be sedated more than necessary. I was so excited to find the best of the best plastic surgeons for my little Prince. However, I love his wide smile, and will miss the look of his first little face. I have a ton of pictures that will forever be cherished. I will share some of the pics I took today for his 1 month milestone.

Our little Prince!

Life with our little prince has been an adventure from the beginning. The surprise pregnancy, the surprise that he was a prince, and finally the big surprise, he had a cleft lip and possible cleft palate. On Dec. 8th 2008 (my 20 week ultra/sound) we were told that we would have to do a repeat u/s because the u/s tech was unable to see the babies nose or upper lip. We were told not to worry that everything was probably ok it was just that the babies head was in a bad position. Finally after 4 long weeks, we had a repeat u/s. It was now Jan 8th 2009. As the u/s tech redid the exam, I noticed the baby had a cleft lip. The tech didn't even notice. After I said a few times that the baby had a cleft and laid there with tears streaming down, she finally called in another u/s tech. Later I found most clefts are not detected by 2D u/s. In fact the second u/s tech had been doing u/s for over 30 years and that was the first cleft she had seen on u/s. After 45 min of u/s the radiologist was called in the verify what we saw. He informed Cameron and I that it looked like a possible cleft lip. About 2 hrs later, I received a phone call from my OB. She told me the baby definitely had a cleft lip and would need to refer me to a perinatologist. It was at this point that I told a hand full of family and friends. We did not mention this to our children or the rest of our family and friends because we weren't sure how to handle it ourselves. I thought I finally would be able to tell everyone before he was born, but I never found the words to say or how to say it. We were finally able to tell our children about a month before he arrived. We still weren't sure if his palate was going to be affected, and we wouldn't know until he was born. The biggest prayer going up now was that he would be able to eat on his own, without the help of a feeding tube.
On Thursday March 26th 2009, a group of friends and my sister threw me the most amazing baby shower. I was in shock at the amount of people who came to support us. The support was simply overwhelming. He got so many cute outfits, blankets, and accessories. Not to mention the fabulous swing and money. WOW - was the baby and I ever spoiled on that night!!! I guess every one was just excited I was finally having a boy :)
On Friday March 27th 2009 labor began but didn't end until Monday March 30th 09 at 11:30 am. Beaudrick Samuel Grant was a special gift of God (this is were the name Samuel comes from). After a quick evaluation, it was determined his upper palate (roof of his mouth) was closed. THANK GOD!!!! However, he did have a gap on his gum line. We are not sure how this will be corrected, but it more than likely won't be until he is 7 years old since it is bone (and not soft tissue) that still has much growing to do.
Tomorrow Beaudrick will meet with a panel of cleft lip/palate nurse coordinators, a genetics Dr., some social workers, and a speech therapist. On May 6th 09 he will meet with several Doctors and surgeons. It is at this time, that we will know more or less when his surgeries will be. It looks like his first surgery will be to correct his cleft lip when he reaches about 10 lbs. as long as he is healthy with no sickness. Because of this, he will not attend Church until his first surgery is complete. Please help us pray for him to remain healthy and for a good outcome. Until then, I will try to keep every one update through my blog.
Thanks for all the love, support, and prayers from all our friends. We wouldn't have been able to stay strong with out God and you all. We Love You All!!!!

Beaudrick Samuel Grant Waage Has Arrived!!!!

Our little prince arrived 4 weeks early on March 30th 2009 at 11:30 am. He weighed 6lbs 11oz. He has a look all of his own. He is perfect in every way. He is an absolute gift of God. Beaudrick is everything and more than I ever wanted in a son. The girls are ecstatic to finally have a little man of their own. We are all in baby heaven. We want to thank every one for all their love and support to our family. We love you all and cant wait to bring our little man home.